Being Still

“Be still, and know that I am God.”—Psalm 46:10a

I don't know about you, but I know all too well about me, that I am rarely still before my God. My prayer life is very weak. It's a struggle to pray for me in the morning. Reading my Bible and asking God to open my eyes that I might understand His precepts and principles better in His Word comes easy. But prayer and resting in His presence is difficult. I could easily blame the ailment of our age—busyness—and its ripple effects in my life, but the truth is I am just not a very still and patient person. I am so busy with all the activity of my day that I find it sometimes “slow” work just to spend quality time with my precious daughter as she explores every rock, leaf, and branch on our walks together around our block. Sometimes I like concentrating on her explorations because in it I do find rest. I am struck with the awareness that there is much about this life that begs slow and easy exploration, the kind my daughter exudes.

But being still also has another meaning in the presence of our Almighty God. This application came to me the other day in the quiet of my heart when I was meditating on a particular prayer request. Because I didn't quickly see how this particular request could be answered and I was contemplating another of my own ideas to try to quickly achieve the result I was praying for, God had stopped my thoughts in their tracks. In that moment, while I was reading Psalm 46, the Lord clearly, gently, and pointedly told me to “Be still, and know that I am God.”

Again, I don't know about you, but when my eyes don't see what my heart is begging to see, I have a tendency to work in my flesh (not walking in the Spirit) toward accomplishing what I believe and perceive to be God's will. The result being that I often find elusive the rest and the stillness this verse addresses. So, it was nice to be reminded at just the right time that God is in control. No matter how big or small my worries and concerns are I can trust God. He wants me to be still from my own works and ideas, and to know that He is in control. He can turn my burdens and my cares into the directions He wants them to go, and all I need to do is just rest in Him.

I know I've often discussed this in previous posts, but I wanted to mention again that I am so grateful for a God who wants to and does communicate to my heart's needs through His word. This is why I try to avail myself of His counsel daily in the morning before all the day's activity begins. I hope I don't come across self righteous or somehow laudatory when I say I really do love reading God's word for this very reason, as if I am somehow better than those who don't or don't even have these kinds of moments with God while reading His word. That's not my hope. My prayer is all who read this do have those very sweet times of fellowship with the Lord, and if they don't, that somehow they may be encouraged to ask God for them. With that said, God's counsel may come in other ways, but it will never contradict His word. So it is still wise to read His word to familiarize yourself with it so that you will not be tossed to and fro by every wind of doctrine (Ephesians 4:14).

In the end, I believe God is asking us all to be still, and know that He, and He alone is God, and that every care, every worry, can be placed in His hands. He knows what He is doing. Sometimes, He may guide us in such a way to be a part of His work, but sometimes I believe He simply calls on us to rest in Him, as He takes care of our heart's desires and needs.

This was such a timely lesson for me in all my busyness, in all my assumptions that somehow my prayer requests need to be answered by me and my plans in my way. To use a modern phrase, we can sum it up with, “God's got this.”

He does. So, let's honor Him by trusting our needs and hopes and all of our despair and care into His precious hands.

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”—Matthew 11:28-30

Without Me You Can Do Nothing

“For without me ye can do nothing.”—John 15:5

I have yet to read a book written by Andrew Murray, but I know he is well known as someone who teaches on prayer very well. During a sermon about a year ago, God spoke to me about three stages of a Christian’s life he defines in his book “Absolute Surrender.”

The first is “I can do it.” This stage is full of our pride, our accomplishments, and our selves. Here is where we fail and then move into the second phase “I can’t do it.” While true, God doesn't want you to stop here. Unfortunately, though, this is where a lot of Christians stop in their walks with God. Through various battles of discouragement, the cares of this world, and frankly, the lies of the devil they come to believe, many Christians stop here and never go further, as they wait on this side of Heaven for their call up. They never reach the Victorious Christian Life on this plain. Instead, they remain on the outer fringes of the Promised Land never tasting the milk and honey of a land where our relationship with God is full and free and our affections for the things of this world die daily.

The last stage is “God can do it through me.” In the sermon, I was again reminded that it is in this stage God can use us. It does not matter if we have skills or talents. I think it could also be added that it doesn’t matter if we have a willing heart because that, too, can be a source of pride. We cannot be fully used of God until we absolutely surrender to Him. I think of my gifts and abilities. My willingness to be used of God. And I have to be honest that I feel like I’m in that first stage again.

I believe throughout the history of my walk with Jesus, He has brought me through these stages over and over. I do not think, at least for me, that this Christian walk is so black and white that once we have crossed over into the Promised Land, that we cannot go back and spend time in the previous stages. Just in reading the Old Testament, the history of the Kings of Judah, for instance, we can see the many ups and downs of God’s people.

I also believe one area of our Christian life may have gotten to the Promised Land, but there are other aspects of our lives that God is still fine-tuning so that He can use us for His glory … for His Kingdom … for that heavenly city where the fruits of His work will reside.

Lord Jesus, you know my arrogance. And you know my willingness. You know my fleshly pride. And you know my desire to be closer to you. I am all mixed up on this plain, believing a lie that to surrender my life to You, which would make an end of me, would be a negative. In one sense it will be. I know my flesh won’t like it. But I know my spirit will thrive and learn of its purpose, and it is only when this happens, that I begin to understand without You, I can do nothing.

Manito Park Rose Garden (Spokane, WA)
September 2007

Long Enough

“And the LORD spake unto me saying, Ye have compassed this mountain long enough: turn you northward.”—Deuteronomy 2:2-3

Reading the Old Testament can be such a faith boost. The story of Israel's wandering in the wilderness for 40 years captures that spirit for me—how that God was with them and guiding them each day through the pillar of fire by night or of cloud by day.

“He spake unto them in the cloudy pillar”(99:7a).

“And when the cloud was taken up from over the tabernacle, the children of Israel went onward in all their journeys: But if the cloud were not taken up, then they journeyed not till the day that it was taken up. For the cloud of the LORD was upon the tabernacle by day, and fire was on it by night, in the sight of all the house of Israel, throughout all their journeys” (Exodus 40:36-38—Emphasis mine)

The story of Moses receiving God's Ten Commandments is another great example of God's divine direction—how God gave us His Law so that we may obey it and live the consequences of our obedience or disobedience to it. (Not for justification before God but for an unburdened conscience before Him along with a freedom to be in fellowship with Him.)

God also spoke through Moses, as was the case in the featured passage above. I love the clarity of direction in this passage. I love the phrase “long enough.” It's as if God is saying, My child, your trials, your journeys, are finished. You are now going to the next phase of your walk with Me. Oh, this phase, too, comes with its trials and battles, but this is the phase I have had for you all along. See, you are now going into the promised land. Despite your little faith, doubting the plan I had for you all along, I was always guiding you to this place in subtle and non-so-subtle ways. You may not have always had the sight to see it afar off, but nevertheless, your promised land was always there for you.

So it is when God speaks to me through my devotional Bible reading from His word with the teaching of His Holy Spirit, guiding me into all truth. It is as if I'm Israel with my own personal pillar of fire by night and of cloud by day, where He is guiding me to the right or left, but always into the direction I should go. When a verse strikes me in its clarity, I trust God is using that verse to guide and comfort me.

There were many years I had pined for a husband and of a family of my own. Upon giving my life to the Lord in my early twenties, God had planted that desire in me. Before then, I had it in my mind that I was going to be a career woman. I told myself I was allergic to men.

I believe getting married and having a family was God's promised land for me, but I had to wander in the wilderness for 14 years while I waited. During that time, God slowly changed my heart and made me ready to receive the man He had for me. God, in effect, at the end of my journey, had said I had been in my wilderness long enough!

So, dear reader, whatever your trial, whatever your waiting, whatever your journey, take comfort in the fact we have a God Who guides our steps along the way, many times despite our lack of faith in Him or despite our grumbling along the journey. He has a promised land He's leading you to. It may not be the promised land you were hoping for or expecting, but He wants you to trust Him that it is the promised land He has for you.

Someday, the promised land He has for all of us who call upon Him for salvation, will be Heaven, itself, where we will forever be in His presence. He will in effect say to all of His children, You have wandered long enough. It's time to come home.

View on Drive Home to Spokane from Seattle
(September 2007)

A Resting Place

“And the ark of the covenant of the LORD went before them in the three days’ journey, to search out a resting place for them.”—Numbers 10:33b

With Thanksgiving drawing near, and along with that, menus to create, shopping lists to make, and chores to do, this season’s busyness may eclipse something very important God wants us to know or, rather, something He wants us to remember: His glorious work in our lives.

My husband and I are participating in a small group at the church we are attending. Over the last couple months, we have met every other week. We have prayed for one another, gotten to know one another, and discussed the Sunday sermons and its themes and how they apply to our lives.

Last night, we broke off into two smaller groups, and a beautiful thing happened in our midst. We each shared our testimonies. We shared salient points in our spiritual journey that led us to Jesus, and the moment we came to faith in Him, each of us coming to Him through different circumstances. 

Some came to faith quietly, others with great drama, and still others somewhere in between.

In that beautiful time of sharing, though, I remembered something so very precious I had forgotten in my own testimony. It was not the story of my faith in Christ but the beginning of my story in how I came to give my life to Him, when I became His disciple.

It began when I had sought counseling from my family’s pastor in my early twenties because I had “blown” it with that same family. I had crossed the line in my anger and disrespect toward them, and I knew I needed help. As I was sitting in this pastor’s living room, he began sharing a story from Scripture. I thought he might as well have been speaking Greek as I was so unused to Biblical names and the formal style of Biblical writing. That did not matter though, because the Holy Spirit removed a dark veil from my understanding and deposited truth into my heart that broke me. In less than an hour, I knew my sin. I knew I had a problem with authority and that was the “root” error in my life and the source of many of my poor decisions. I knew it was a result of my parents’ divorce and the broken boundaries that resulted. I knew it was not my fault, which gave me a tremendous amount of consolation and comfort. What was my fault and would continue to be my fault, though, was how I would choose to live my life in light of my problem with authority.

When I left this wonderful pastor’s home (he did become my pastor, by the way, and he was a man God used to grow me and mold me into the Christian I am today), I remember walking to my car and having this sense of vulnerability I had not experienced for a long time. It was as if my heart that had been hardened over the years had finally softened and became open to the love of God for me. At the same time, God healed me in that He gave me the ability to forgive my father, who I was the most hurt by, as he was the one who left our family and started this cascade of unfortunate events in my life that were out of my control.

It was the most beautiful thing, and sadly, I had forgotten it. I did not forget Him giving me the gift of His forgiveness toward my dad, but I forgot being broken through His Word sitting in my soon-to-be pastor’s living room. I forgot that beautiful feeling of vulnerability after so many years of being hard.

Well, this Thanksgiving, I want to remember how God brought me to my “resting place.” I want to remember how much He loves me and how much He sought me out and cleaned up my life in order to experience His love with a pure conscience. My sins had become such a heavy load, and I was nearing the moment I would repent of those sins and lay my life down at His feet to do with it what He will. But before the moment I gave my life to Him, Jesus had allowed me to truly feel His life in me for which I am thankful.

I encourage you to reflect on your journey with the Lord and remember a time you clearly felt His work in your life. Ask Him to show you a detail you may have forgotten and thank Him for what He has done for you.

And have a marvelous Thanksgiving!

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.”—James 2:17

Park Bench in Onesti, Romania
(May 2005)

A Sweet Savor

 “A sweet savour unto the LORD.”—Leviticus 1:9b

“For we are unto God a sweet savour of Christ.”—2 Corinthians 2:15

  

The Bible has a lot to say about sacrifices, offerings and atonement in both the Old and New Testaments. Some of it is very dry reading and quite gruesome, but the truths these verses express are anything but dull, especially when we ponder that the ultimate sacrifice was the one Christ did of Himself on our behalf, when He bled, suffered and died in our stead for the just punishment of every sin that has ever been committed (and will be committed) since Adam's sin in the Garden of Eden.

Unfortunately, not everyone who has ever lived has accepted that free and precious gift of Jesus' death on the cross. And the hell that was created solely for the devil and his angels (Matthew 25:41) has to enlarge itself each time a person dies without believing on Jesus and receiving His forgiveness of sins (Isaiah 5:14). In other words, they never received the sweet savor of Christ's sacrifice on their behalf. That savor that only Christ can offer, that goes up to the throne in Heaven, before God the Father, on our behalf.

Praise the Lord that there are many from every tribe, kindred, and language, who do believe in Jesus. They go before God the Father in Heaven and become “a sweet savour of Christ” to Him. That picture is so beautiful to me because it has nothing to do with my worth or my unworthiness. It has nothing to do with what country I live in or who my parents are. It has everything to do with Christ, Who He is and what He's done.

Which brings me to the heart of what I want to say on these verses above. When reading Leviticus 1:9 the other day, it occurred to me that I want to be a sweet savor to my Lord Jesus. I want to grow more in His image. I want my works to express the truths of His Word, the results of which become a sweet smell rising to Heaven under the nose of my Savior.

What this means for me is that I think it is time for a season of consecration to the Lord, when I sacrifice myself on the altar of His love and make myself open and available to be molded and changed into the person He wants me to be. This may hurt. This may show me sins I have yet to see and repent of.

I know this will be hard work, but this will be work He does in my life to bring me closer to Him, which is something I so desire.

After all, it is my reasonable service unto Him for all He's done for me. (Romans 12:1)

St.Vitus Cathedral in Prague, Czech Republic
(August 2005)

Job's Surrender

“Then Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped, and said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; 
blessed be the name of the Lord.”—Job 1:20-21

The Bible is a mirror to my heart, and in reading this passage, I find my heart to be shamefully fearful of experiencing the tribulations of Job. I am apprehensive of giving my life so completely to God, to say unto Him, Lord, whatever You need to do in my life to make it the witness, the light, the testimony, etc., it needs to be, it’s Yours to do with what You wish. Only You know what needs to happen in my life to make it complete in You, and I give it to You.

I do believe I did just that in my early twenties, as my first step in faith to truly follow Jesus, and it was the best decision I have ever made. But as I mature in the Lord, and time keeps ticking by, I know that sentiment is not often true for me in my daily surrenders to God.

I want my life to be a bed of roses. I want to walk among pillowy beds of ease. I want to have pleasing things to happen to me. I want.

Ironically, when I am in this self-centered frame of mind, my spirit enjoys no peace and no rest.

So often, I am fearful of each step, thinking that the next one may be the one that shakes my foundations, and not in a good way, at least to the eyes of flesh.

I find that I am too selfish to let go of what comforts I have in the present, and thereby neglect the blessings and riches of God that I would have otherwise experienced had I just given Him my worries, my fears, my joys, my successes ... my present and my future.

Really, into whose hands is it better to give my life to? 

Oh, Lord, Jesus, help me surrender my all to You in the big and little things, without fear and with complete trust, even if that trust may be timid at first.

Originally written on October 4, 2002, when I was studying the book of Job.

Barsanesti, Romania (August 2005)

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MY FIRST CONTEST-REMINDER-ENDS TODAY!

In celebration of receiving "50 Likes" on my facebook page and having 50 posts written on my blog as of today, I want to give away one of the pictures on my blog, as well as try and get more readers!

So, how are we going to do this?

I will enter you in my contest to receive a free photo (assuming you want a matted 3x5/4x6 photo of your choice from my blog AND mailed to you free of charge, ANYWHERE in the world!) if you:

1. Like my page on Facebook (and haven't already) or if you follow my blog via Google+;
2. Sign up to receive emails when I put out a new post (you will need to subscribe to “Receive Emails” on the blog itself and then you will get an email in which you will need to verify you want to receive emails); OR
3. Recommend a friend and they like my page, which was the original goal of the contest. Somehow you or your friend will need to let me know they've signed up via a message on my page or some other way. 

It's possible to enter more than once, if you do more than one of the above.

The contest began yesterday (Tuesday, August 20th), and it will end next Tuesday, on August 27^th at midnight (the midnight where you are located in the world!).

This is my first contest, so it may be a work in progress. Please don't hesitate to ask me any questions.

Again, the prize will be a matted 3x5 or 4x6 picture of your choosing, mailed to you at no cost, anywhere in the world.

So, here we go. Happy contesting. And God bless you today!